Journaling: The Best Way To Heal After A Breakup

You have invested time and emotions into a person for some time and now it is over. You are single…like really single. No prospects, no potentials. It is just you, yourself and you again.

We already know there are a plethora of emotions one experiences after the end of a relationship, but what are you supposed to do next? Date someone new? That maybe the next best choice for some because you are ready to do things differently the next time around. You also are done with repeating old patterns. This was me. Now, a year and a half later I look back and think how I got from there to here. I am a lot happier (of course) and most importantly more at peace. The answer, I started writing. Every day. Sometimes even twice a day. I left it all on paper. From the days of being okay and acceptance, to moments of frustration, disappointment and sadness, I wrote it all down.

Journaling has been the most therapeutic thing I have ever experienced. I knew for some time that writing was always a good way to “get your thoughts out”, but this process became even more beneficial and necessary after the end of my relationship. Journaling becomes most important during times like a breakup because you have the ability to be completely honest with yourself. Sure, I was able to be open and honest with friends and family and tell them how I felt, but it wasn’t until I started journaling where I really became vulnerable and wrote out my deepest and most honest truths. The best part is the journal can’t tell anyone what you said. It is truly a vault where you can be your true authentic self. You now have all this free time so what are you going to do? Journaling is a great way to take up some of that time.

Develop a routine. Each morning I make sure to write my first thoughts of the day. Sometimes I may also take time out to journal in the evening and reflect on that day and revelations I may have experienced. Writing started as something to distract me from all my post breakup emotions and it has now transformed into my everyday routine. Look back on your growth. The golden takeaway from journaling is the opportunity to see what your growth over time looks like.

After about a year of writing I took time out to re-read every entry I wrote from the very beginning. I was amazed to see how my thinking and overall mindset shifted the more I wrote down my thoughts. Eventually, I found myself in a state of peace and ready to truly move forward with my life. Everyone handles situations differently, but it is important to start the healing process. Your writing doesn’t have to be a long eloquent essay, but your own words. No need to worry about how it sounds to others because it is for you to see and read. Even if it is a simple sentence of two. Over time you will find it easier to be honest, open and vulnerable with your feelings.

As women we are emotional creatures and can harbor a lot of emotions when unpleasant events such as a breakup happens in our lives. It is important in those moments to have a way to release those emotions in a healthy way. This is what makes writing that more special.


Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart. William Wordsworth


Charlene is a native of Boston, MA. A city girl at heart. Currently working in Human Resources for a financial services firm. Keep up with her on her lifestyle blog, The Social Experience ( and on Twitter (@TheSoc_Exp) and Instagram (@thesocialexpcc)

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